For months I've been struggling off and on with the fact that we only see each other once a week. Every week it's absolutely wonderful! We go out to eat, do fun things with kid, cuddle up to a movie, and have mind blowing sex before sleeping in each other's arms.
I've had to resist the psychotic urge to beg you to move in. It's only been 7 months. I know it's too soon and it's healthy to wait. I've also had to resist the urge to pout and tell you to come over more. I've made it clear I want you to come over more, but I know it's my BPD wanting to guilt you for working so much. It's great that you're working and it's healthy that you want to go home. Duh, I'm not going to reveal my crazy about it.
This morning I finally stated it. Once a week isn't enough. I want more time with you. My heart lit up and fireworks exploded as you suggested clearing out a drawer so you can keep some things here so you could come over more often.
I had to resist the urge to jump up and empty my sock and junk drawer right then and there and tell you I'll do laundry right now so you can come back tonight!!!
Even now, after you've eaten breakfast, danced around the kitchen with me, and kissed me before going off to work - I'm resisting the urge to go all Marie Kondo on my room and start reorganizing every drawer and closet so you move your entire house here!
The goal for long term relationships is the eventual home combining, and I know starting with a drawer is the perfect place for us to be. It feels like a prayer has been answered and things are moving forward and my heart is going to explode with bright shining sparkles and orgasms!
A drawer!! I can do that.
First, I can get Kid off to school and go on with my day. It's usually hard after you leave, I tend to feel like I'm hung over from the ecstasy of your presence. Right now though, I'm still high, and I hope to hang on to that.
With Love,
Your Adoring BPD GF
No comments:
Post a Comment